Don’t get caught out at the company Christmas Party.

Advice from a crossdressing Account Executive for the company Christmas Party.

I am always pleased to help out my members and keep them on the right track. With this in mind the following list of thoughts has been compiled from the experiences and suggestions of some of my valued members.

  1. It is no longer acceptable to sit on the photocopier during the Christmas Party photocopying your bum and handing out prints saying it’s another memo from the accounts department.
  2. When sitting on the photocopier (see #1) do not make the mistake of scanning your bottom and posting it to the company Instagram Account.
  3. Taking a co-worker to the Christmas Party does not count as a first date.
  4. Don’t sleep with Brenda, the head of Human Resources on the first date (see #3).
  5. Line ups at the STD Clinic are generally shorter during the holiday period.
  6. When asked what you were thinking (See #4), replying “Everyone else has,” is not considered a good reason.
  7. It’s no fun being on antibiotics through the Christmas period.

If you have Christmas Party suggestions please make a point of sharing them below.

Fiona

I’ve laid the table, now what’s next?

I really do enjoy having a few friends over in the evening. So it was that I found myself, just the other day, hosting a small party with Sylvester, Auntie Kittie, Sebastian, Rainbow and her new friend, Epiphany. Just use those links if you’d like to explore a little more detail of each of these great friends.

I’d prepared a small variety of dishes. You know how it is when you are taking into account the various dietary needs of people, I’m sure. When I had asked Epiphany what sort of foods she enjoyed she had informed me that she ‘preferred not to feast on the flesh of murdered animals.’

Epiphany is a very slight girl. I am sure she’ll become Rainbow’s lover. She has very small hands.

As Sylvester was listening to Rainbow talking about a flasher who has been frightening people in a local park, I put out the tofu drizzled with a peanut satay sauce.

“He was about average height and had a big coat. And I think he was right handed,” said Rainbow who didn’t seem the slightest concerned that she’d been exposed to in such a manner, when out for her evening run.

“How exciting,” I said. “And with all this cold weather, too!”

Epiphany and Rainbow, both choosing not to eat meat, were extolling the virtues of a vegetarian diet.

“I have often thought I should become vegetarian,” I said. “Though I really do enjoy seafood.”

Sylvester decided to chime in and added, “Fiona does love a winkle in cider now and then.”

I told Sylvester to shut up, you know he really can be quite coarse at times.

At this point Auntie Kittie chimed in that she thought everybody loves a well prepared bird on the table, “and honestly, girls, who doesn’t love a good stuffing?”

I gave Sylvester a sharp kick under the table as I saw his mouth open, but before he could make some crude comment. He muttered something about everyone loving a good sausage.

It’s such a good thing I always prepare a variety delights for my guests. I served the various dishes but not before suggesting to my assembled guests that they should be sure to leave a little room for desert. What a surprise it was for them when, after I cleared away the main course Auntie emerged from the kitchen and whipped out her dumplings covered in cream!

But that’s not the main reason I’m writing to you today. I am trying to build up my Patreon following. It’s an up hill struggle, but the more members I can grow there, the more content I can release. Your support is greatly appreciated, especially in these tough times. In case you don’t know you can support me there by subscribing for as little as $5, or if you choose to become one of my Unicorn level members you can get one of my famous ‘You want me to use which bathroom’ mugs. Who could resist such an offering!

Have a lovely evening,

Fiona

PS. Enjoy the video with Annie Lennox, Hugh Laurie and John Malkovich below.

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The three things you can do right now to advance transgender rights.

I am often asked by my members and friends, ‘what can I do right now to stop the spread of hate that is so pervasive in American politics today?’. While it’s great to march or protest, the fact remains many of us don’t wish to out ourselves in that way.

Yet, we also want to do what we can to support trans rights, and simply prevent the relentless onslaught on gender issues that seems to be a part of life in America today. My response is usually the same.  Vote.

However, there’s only the opportunity to vote every couple of years and for some people it can seem a pointless exercise, particularly if you live in a state that is overwhelmingly controlled by the Republican party. Today I have a simple recipe for people wanting to make a difference. Here are three simple things that you can do that will help. In suggesting these initiatives I would remind my friends that this is a long game. It took a long time to win the freedoms we have achieved so far, and it may take a long time to protect them.

Continue reading “The three things you can do right now to advance transgender rights.”

Auntie wants to know if you’ve been a good boy.

As my little nephew Gerald was helping me with a few personal tasks the other day I asked myself, I wonder how my favorite little sissy is doing? How are you getting along, ? I’m sure you’d just love to be in his place. Why just this afternoon he was helping me.

“That’s it, Gerald, stir it round and round the bowl. Faster. Here let me help you,” and to be extra helpful I stood behind him, my breasts against his shoulders as I reached around and vigorously stirred the cake mix. I really do work up a little sweat as I work away at it! It’s just as well I have a strong right arm.

Poor little Gerald, he’s quite overcome!

“Oh no!” I said as I lifted the bowl and placed it on the counter. “Some of the cake mix has dripped from the spoon right between my
 my
 chest.”

“Can I lick it,” asked little Gerald.

“Gerald!” I exclaimed. “Oh, you mean the spoon! Of course.”

After such a busy afternoon in the kitchen I think I’d better go and get a towel to clean up. After all, I want little Gerald to look forward to coming again and again and learning to help in the kitchen.

Join me for just $4.99 a month and I’m sure I can give you something special too! You may even want to join my Whatsapp Group and chat with other CDs and sissies, if you’ve not done so already.

Your favorite Auntie,

Auntie Kittie.

PS. Get more of my content HERE.

Become a Patron! Join as a Good Gurl Member today for just $4.99 a month.

Help! There’s a bunch of fascists at my Thanksgiving Dinner!

I hope you’re ready for the thanksgiving celebrations, where we turn to look at one another and count our blessings. A time when every self respecting crossdresser looks about at their closest family and wonders “Oh my god! Who the hell are these people!”

Yes, many of my members have said to me that this is one of the most challenging times of year for them. It ranks right along with Christmas, when friends and family wear their bad taste sweaters and we can barely find the time or space to slip into a nice pair of frilly panties or a simple skirt and blouse.

And, of course, there’s the family get together. That joyful time when our distant relatives become our nearest and not so dearest, reminding us that there’s a reason we don’t invite Uncle Billy Bob and his revolting offspring to visit every other weekend of the year. As they pull up, parking in the bike lane outside the apartment, in their Dodge Asshole Wagon, complete with confederate flag licence plate, we are can only reflect that it is sometimes our differences that make us strong. And that as they unload their arsenal of concealed carry weaponry, it sometimes isn’t.

As Sylvester told me just the other day, “My brother in law arrived, and I said to him to make himself at home.”

“Well, that’s very courteous of you, Sylvester. Well done,” I replied. I like to encourage any evidence of humanity in Sylvester.

He went on to say that his brother said, ‘I always do. Wherever I hang my hat is home!’”

His brother in law then took off his MAGA hat, hung it on the spare room door and went on to spend most of the weekend banging Sylvester’s long suffering sister while poor Sylvester ended up baby sitting their three revolting children. The weekend was only brought to a hurried close when one of their neighbours called to tell him that their landlord was loading their belongings onto a truck and they were being evicted.

Worried that he might have taken the whole ‘make yourself at home’ thing a little too literally, Sylvester waited till they’d hurriedly rushed home four hours away, and then packed his own place up, locked it securely, turned off his cell phone and went on an extended four day fishing trip with Bernard.

As much as we do love our families, many of us feel we don’t need to expose them to this particular side of our nature. As such, and I know this is hard, we sometimes have to smile and bite our tongue as we listen to their insane rhetoric and political views, and quietly remind ourselves, ‘it’s only once or twice a year.’ There are some arguments that there is no point engaging in.

In all seriousness, I do urge you as we go into this Thanksgiving holiday, when a family member bursts forth with some offensive views, ask yourself, ‘Is this an argument I can possibly win? Will Uncle Billy Bob really turn round later and say, ‘Gee, you know you’re right!’. If the answer is ‘no’, then I suggest you to learn the words that every good husband learns at some point in a marriage:

“You’re probably right, dear.”

One can learn to say those treasured words in such a way that everyone else around the Thanksgiving table knows damned well that what you’re really saying is, “You’re an uninformed bigoted idiot and you’re wrong”. We save our energy for the battles that can be won. They are more often subtle, the evidence of our own kindness, and the way we lead by example, allowing our sensitive more loving nature to lead our actions. We are, after all, the living proof of our worthiness.

So, how does one strike back? One does so quietly, with grace and calm. One way is to make sure you vote in all elections for people that share your values. Obviously today I am speaking mainly to my US audience, but these words are equally true wherever you are. For US members, understanding that many of the values presented by the Republican party are resulting in our sisters being targeted and abused is something we simply cannot ignore. While we may not change much by getting in an argument with Uncle Billy Bob, we can use our vote to instigate wider change.

Another way to help is, if you’re feeling strongly about these issues, back a politician who is making a difference for our community with a donation, even if it’s only a few dollars. I am not generally a fan of politicians, but these are trying times. I can wholeheartedly recommend Zooey Zephyr, who is doing great work in Montana. Even if you don’t live in Montana, helping Zooey is a good way to move our agenda forward. If we can make headway there, we will encourage people to come forward elsewhere.

And finally, if all else fails, you can become a member with me and support my work. I say that as, in my own small way, I do my best to be supportive to the trans community and many of my crossdressing members who cannot openly show themselves, by providing supportive content. I’m currently trying to rebuild my Patreon base, so even joining as a Good Gurl for just $5 goes a long way to delivering quality supportive material to your sisters.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving, and know that as one of my members, I give thanks for you.

Below is some good advice from Natalie Wynn, Contrapoints. Have a wonderful weekend.

Fiona

Become a member!

I think Sylvester took that whole ‘dance as if no one is watching’ thing a little too seriously.

I am sure you know, I work at an advertising agency. More accurately, I attend. Fortunately the partners seem to enjoy having me around.

As luck would have it I was invited to a party being thrown by one of the partner’s wives, and against my better judgement decided to bring Sylvester as my plus one. I should have realised this was a bad idea, but all the same Sylvester lurched his way into the beach front condo and mingled with the various guests. I knew a few of those invited, but to be honest I think I was only invited to bump the numbers up a little.

Across the room Sylvester quaffed his beer heartily and started in on another bawdy story to the poor man he was cornering.

“So, this priest, a hooker and a dwarf go into a bar,” said Sylvester. I decided to withdraw to the other side of the room. You know, Sylvester can be really quite coarse at times.

Instead I reluctantly listened to one of the guests walking me through her organic method of vaginal hygiene, and asking me if I thought it might have commercial potential. This is an occupational hazard when one is in marketing. One has to look interested and nod a great deal.

Chantelle, the partner’s wife, eventually collared me and to my surprise told me that they were so pleased I’d brought Sylvester, still talking to the pale looking man he’d cornered earlier.

“Really,” I said, quite puzzled. “Sylvester is a little,” and here I searched for words, “
a little fundamental for most polite company.”

“It’s so good to see someone getting on so well with my brother,” said Chantelle. “He finds it so hard to connect with people since he was ordained.”

But that’s not the main reason I’m writing today.

I thought I’d just remind you how very well received some of my hypnosis MP3’s have been. You can see a few HERE. Be sure to check them out. By using them in the evenings before you go to sleep you can enjoy the effect of hypnosis. Let me know how you get along.

🙂

Fiona

Become a member!

The Stories Your Mother Never Told You.

Hidden away, but never forgotten there are stories your mother never told you. Stories you’d never have thought possible, but for the fact that a collection of papers have been acquired by Mistress Meg.

Collected and carefully compiled these documents reveal the salacious goings on of women in a small town in the 1950’s. Presented here, purely for educational purposes, Mistress Meg reveals the nature of passions that run unbridled as husbands spend their days working. Brought together lovingly for my Seahorse members, these stories reveal a salacious view of the world from the perspective of girdled and brassiered women for whom the term ‘lady’ has long since been made no longer relevant.

Valerie helps some of the other young women of the small town find meaning in their lives, in their passions and in their bedrooms, never afraid to tease and make fun of her hard working husband.

Join her in these stories of passion that are “The Stories Your Mother Never Told You.

Join my Seahorse level here. I’m warning you now though, you may never think of your mother the same way again.

A little something to help you through the daily grind.

“You know,” I said to Sylvester as he got ready with some lube, “I feel I need to give my gurls a little bit of a hand from time to time.”

Sylvester looked up at me, applying the shiny liquid to his shaft.

“You’re so thoughtful, Fiona.”

You will remember that Sylvester is a mechanic. He’s restoring an old engine at present. He knows the value of making sure all the parts are well lubricated.

“Are you sure it’s going to fit,” I asked as he slid the shaft into a tight fitting sleeve.

“You’d be amazed what a good amount of lubrication can do,” he said concentrating on the job in hand.

The shaft slid home with a satisfying metallic sigh.

“Goodness,” I said with a slight gasp. “You’re really very good at this.”

“Yes,” he said with a look of studied concentration. “Lubrication is the key to so many things.”

“You know you’re right!” I replied. “I just feel I want to help my members feel a sense of satisfaction. So many of them put up with so much.”

It was as I thought about this that I decided to post a few pictures that might elevate your mood. You know, if you’re on this site then I am like a sister to you. And any good sister would be prepared to bend over backwards to help you feel good about yourself.

Do you think I should bend over backwards for you? Well, register and see what I have as you slip inside the website. You know the deeper and deeper you go into it the more satisfying it can be. Come on. Register here, and go really deep. Just the way I like it.

🙂

Fiona

PS – be sure to sign up for one of my programs to experience the deep satisfaction we both crave.

Part 67 of Clothes Maketh The Man is out!

– Find Part 1 here â€“ Chapter list here â€“

The movement of the train threw us together again and our bodies seemed alive with energy.

“But how?” I said, astonished that 30 had a key to the very thing that stood between us.

“Later,” she said reaching down and unlocking the device between her legs. It’s components clattered to the floor.

“I only have the key for mine,” she said.

I felt a moment of disappointment but not before 30’s hand came up to my chest, pushed me down on the seat behind me and pressed against me.

“Don’t worry,” she said. “You’re going to love it anyway!”

READ ON…

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Get help with clothing, make up and the full aesthetic of crossdressing. Learn how to behave in a more sensitive manner. Then find that gentler side of your mind. You will learn to look, act and feel more like the gurl you know you can be.

Sign up for the fun way to get the most out of crossdressing and exploring your feminine side. Whether you’re interested in occasionally enjoying crossdressing, or you’re on your journey to complete transition, this is a wonderful way to explore the crossdressing and understand it like you never thought you could.

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Getting Astride Sylvester’s Boner.

What a creative group of people I surround myself with, I thought to myself as I sat on Sylvester’s boner. It was shaking this way and that, the vibrations rising up through my body in a very unsettling manner.

Sylvester’s workshop has all manner of strange things in it. He is quite the amateur inventor. He’d called me earlier that day, excited about his new development. Naturally, I hurried over to his workshop to see what the fuss was all about.

As I arrived Bernard, my photographer, was pulling up.

“He want’s me to photograph it,” he said as we entered the workshop. “Say’s it’s an historical moment.”

As we arrived Sylvester stood beside a large cube shaped object. I thought it might be a washing machine, though it was covered with a sheet. Suddenly, with a great flourish, Sylvester swept away the sheet revealing a strange device with the words “The Boner” skillfully painted over the front of it.

“Let me demonstrate my new invention,” he said, clearly expecting our excitement to match his.

I clutched my hands before me, teetered to and fro on my heels, and said, “How exciting!”

With that Sylvester brought a small basket of frozen chickens, probably about five, and emptied them into the chamber in the centre of the cube. He then released a valve and I could hear water filling the chamber and see steam rising.

Bernard started snapping off pictures, and I began to smell chicken cooking as Sylvester closed the chamber. There were spurting sounds, and something that looked like a cappuccino machine released steam from the side of the contraption. In a few moments a bell ran, and chicken broth was pumped from a pipe at the foot of the machine.

Then the device started vibrating and shaking, and a burst of super heated steam was released. It looked ok for a moment and then I noticed the look of panic on Sylvester’s face.

“Quick, Fiona, climb on the Boner. You sit on it while I get out my tool.”

“Sylvester
” I said uncertainly. “I’m not sure about this.” It seemed to be shaking and rattling quite dangerously.

“Climb on it or it may shake itself to destruction.” Sylvester was reaching into one of the colorful tool chests, trying to find his special tool.

I carefully climbed on to the Boner, the shaking going through my whole body. As I sat there I thought it was going to explode, and I must say my breath was quite taken away.

And then, quite suddenly Sylvester was there, between my legs with his tool. He jerked it this way and that and before long the shaking began to subside. At last there was a gurgling sound and a hatch popped open revealing two draws. Sylvester opened one, and brought out some perfectly cooked chicken meat. The smell filled the workshop with a delicious aroma.

From the second draw he drew out a tray containing all the chicken bones, completely cleaned of meat.

“It’s perfect,” he cried out. “Every bone has been extracted and the meat remains undamaged.”

“Goodness,” I said, feeling quite out of breath. “What a remarkable invention. I can imagine everyone will want a Boner.”

Sylvester said, “Imagine, a Boner in every kitchen!”

Bernard chimed in “People will be asking what on earth they did before they had a Boner!”

“Imagine, if you could find a way to extract the dark meat,” I said.

“I should think that would make it much bigger,” mused Sylvester. “Do you think there’d be a market for such a thing? It would be a much larger and more powerful Boner.”

“I can’t see that being a bad thing,” I replied.

So you can see it’s been a very eventful few days. Have a wonderful weekend!

🙂

Fiona

When was the last time you played around? Dressed? That’s got to be a good one for Playtime With Fiona! My good friend and member of our Whatapp Group, Daphanie, loves to play a round of golf fully dressed.  What’s your secret pleasure?

 

Don’t forget, I’ve got many free videos for you on Youtube.

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When you sign up for my Premium Program, you get a series of exercises, as well as the self hypnosis and educational information for Julie and myself, that’s sure to make all your crossdressing activities way more fun. One recent member wrote: “Your program changed my life))) especially the initial encounter with the man who is now my bf)) thank you!!!”

Whether you want to just occasionally slip on some panties, or whether you’d like to pass, my Premium Program prepares you psychologically, physically and educationally for all you need to know. You can sign up today for just $14.99 a month. Join the many members who are finding more acceptance and happiness in this wonderful part of their life.

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