I was a little late into my office this morning. I washed my hair after a particularly strenuous yoga workout this morning, and I simply had to let it dry before coming to the office.   I have a delightful black blouse on, and a black and white skirt. Very Kate Spade. The cool weather demands some nice stockings, too.

As you know, I prefer to work from home, but do show up to the office now and then.  This is mostly to annoy Brenda in the human resources department, but you know, one has to show willing. By the way, have you read ‘Getting To No – Telling Clients and co-workers to sod off without offending them’? It’s an interesting look at the modern workplace and something that is becoming required reading in some business groups and gender studies groups. That sounds really boring, but give it a try.

I wandered into the office a little after 11, and to my surprise was met by an unfamiliar voice saying, “Hello, big boy.”

I froze and immediately checked my reflection in the full length mirror I insisted the facilities boys install in my office. That was when I noticed the parrot sitting on my desk.

At that very moment Sylvester entered my office behind me and said, “I see you’ve met Captain.”

I can only assume Sylvester had dropped by to annoy the girls in accounting. He really can be quite coarse, you know.

“You have a parrot?” I said.

“I inherited him,” replied Sylvester. “He’s a macaw.”

“Well, I don’t appreciate being misgendered first thing in the morning,” I said and sat down at my desk. “Who did you inherit him from?”

“My uncle,” said Sylvester as he put out his arm and the brightly colored creature stepped up on the outstretched limb and then languidly sidled up to Sylvester’s shoulder.

“Oh,” I said. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you had an uncle. Or that he died.”

“Oh, it was a while back. I didn’t really know him very well. He left me a few hundred dollars,” explained Sylvester.

“And a parrot?” I asked.

“Well, sort of. Captain’s been passed around since my uncle died. He’s been to practically everyone in the family, and now it’s my turn. I think I’m going to hang on to him,” said Sylvester, stroking the bird under his chin.

“Show us your tits,” said Captain. “Show us your tits.”

“I think I see the problem,” I said. “Perhaps you should close my door. I’m not sure the staff share Captain’s permissive conversation style.”

“My uncle was a doctor,” said Sylvester by way of explanation as he closed the door.

“I see.  You know how old Captain is?” I asked.

“Not really,” said Sylvester.

“Do you have any idea how long parrots live?” I pressed on.

“No. It’s not really something I’ve looked into.”

I looked at Sylvester skeptically. However, on the desk before me was a catalogue of products which I have to examine for the advertising agency. We are pitching for a new account and the first step is to thoroughly understand their product line. And that brings me to the reason for this email.

I am often asked to help members who feel they are unable to dress, because their spouse is not entirely on board with the whole ‘crossdressing thing’. Many times I remind them that the best approach is not to inform their significant other that, ‘darling it doesn’t matter what you do, I just look better in your panties than you do!’

To totally suppress these desires doesn’t work very well. And furtive dressing sessions can be very unfulfilling. A more successful approach is to gently introduce the shift toward a more feminine approach. And that’s what I am going to talk about today.

There are many ways to dress in a more androgynous way, without completely going over to crossdress in public. A good start is to reconsider colors. Hard contrasty colors are very masculine. Hard blacks and reds are quire aggressive. Instead, selecting a softer palette of pastel colors where possible is a wonderful first step. A pastel blue or lemon sweater or shirt can be quite femme looking.

Something else to give some thought to is the fabrics that you wear.  I prefer lambswool or angora to cottons or nylons when it comes to sweaters. I avoid brand names and always wear soft colors. It telegraphs my own softness and sensitivities. It’s also perfectly acceptable in most office environments. And keep in mind, a touch of lipstick or putting on heels and you’re crossdressing if you choose to go that far. Super femme.

When it comes to jeans, if I’m out sanding my boat, or helping Sylvester get to grips with his half shaft, I’m wearing the 501’s. But when I’m casually dressing I always go for a femme cut pair of jeans, preferably with a bit of stretch. Mavi is a good place to start with this.

So, without going full on femme, this will help and even if you’re unable to dress as much as you’d like, this gives you a more androgynous look without overtly crossdressing. You can learn much more about this in my Premium Program. I have some other wonderful ideas for when you’re unable to dress as you wish in there under the title “The Empresses New Clothes”.

Now, I am going to have to go and get ready for some work – well, lunch at any rate – and I have to get this obscene creature out of my office. I should eject the parrot, too.

Have a wonderful week,

Fiona.

PS. Surrounded by energy stealing assholes? Crank up the volume and listen to the video below. Then come and join my Patreon for as little as $1. https://www.patreon.com/fionadobsonCD

Kate Spade Lightweight Compact Umbrella with Storage Sleeve – $48.95

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