I know that many of my members are frustrated at being locked down, and as the days go by it can seem like there’s no end in sight. I recently listened to a BBC report from a US reporter locked down in Wuhan, who described the experience as being a psychological process not unlike the stages of grief.
There are various descriptions of this around the net, but the most common appears to suggest the following are stages of grief:
Denial – Sylvester: “This isn’t necessary!” Me: “Tell that to the people without health insurance.”
Anger – Amanda: “I’ll be buggered if I’m wearing a mask.” Me: “Please wear a mask.”
Bargaining – Sebastian: “If I socially isolate today, maybe we’ll get past this sooner.” Me: “Let’s do it.”
Depression – Auntie Kittie: “Let’s hit the wine reserves.” Me: “Yours or mine?”
Acceptance – Ali: “The garden looks nice today.” Me: “The garden looks lovely.”
I thought this a very interesting way of thinking about this. We’re just going to have to get used to this. There’s no arguing with it, and as much as some orange haired buffoon might try to push people back to work early, the health of those I love are more important to me than his profits. So, I would like to share a few things to help you get through this difficult time. These are merely the opinions of a crossdressing advertising executive, and I don’t expect the world to whole heartedly agree with me. However, you may find some of these suggestions to be of interest.
Steffi, one of our members of the Whatsapp Group is breaking up her lockdown time by participating in some volunteer schemes to distribute food to people less fortunate than themselves. You may see some volunteer groups on your social media. Be sure, however, that the group is bona fide and working within proper social distancing practices that don’t bring risk to either yourself or others that you may come into contact with.
We don’t want things to turn out the way they did when Sebastian volunteered at the leprosy treatment centre. With all the good will in the world, some things don’t turn out the way they were intended, even when they are started with the best of intentions. Teaching the leprosy patients the Hokey Pokey may not have been the best idea Sebastian ever had.
You can also find an online activity such as our Whatsapp Group. The gurls in there have created some great daily activities. Toenail Tuesday is a great success. We also have some days where we focus on makeup or other ideas. It’s never dull in there, so if you’re bored be sure to sign up if you’re not in there already.
Some of the luckiest of us are able to get out once or twice a day to exercise or walk the dog. If you’re someone who doesn’t get the chance to dress outside often, this suggestion may be just right for you. A fun challenge, particularly as the streets are largely empty, is to get on a bicycle fully dressed. A pair of sunglasses and a wig under your helmet won’t go amiss. Ripping around a cycle route fully dressed is a lovely way to experience being dressed in public, with little likelihood of bumping into anyone that might embarrass you.
This is also a time for reflection. It’s a good time to remind ourselves what’s really important. I don’t mean that in a theoretical way. I mean it in a much more practical manner. While you’re in lockdown asking yourself what really is important to you may be a good time to reset some of the things you’ve been taking for granted. Many of us will want to work from home permanently in the future, for example. How would you like your life to look as things settle down. What would you change about your life?
I particularly enjoyed going back to an old ContraPoints video (above) and watching it again. It seemed particularly poignant in light of recent events. Natalie Wynn is always thought provoking. She’s lovely.
Anyone who is in the CD or non-binary world has to be adaptable. It’s part of our nature. And this is an opportunity to adapt and reinvent. It may be a great time to rethink some fundamental values.
You’ll see I didn’t say ‘return to normal’. That’s because things won’t return to ‘normal’. Things will be different. And if we’re smart we can use this time to make it a better life.