At the time of writing we are in the midst of a Corona Virus lockdown. We’re 8 weeks into it, here in Vancouver, and most of us have not seen many people throughout this period. For some it’s been a period of reflection, and a chance to rethink many of the things we have formerly taken for granted.
Many of us have struggled with the idea of how we identify with genders. This is nothing new and is a confusing and troubling subject that is often hard to discuss. I’ve said many times that we shouldn’t concern ourselves with gender labels, or for that matter sexuality labels. My experience is that they’re confusing, mean different things to different people, and really don’t serve us well. They may serve those who wish to judge us, or shove us into a pigeon hole – a prospect that doesn’t seem either appealing or comfortable – but exactly how does that serve us?
Yet there is always that question, “what am I?” Am I ‘trans’, or ‘gender fluid’ or some other label that helps me understand myself. What are the boundaries here and where do I fit?
My constant mantra here is not to judge others, nor allow their judgement to hurt you. Placing a label is doubtless a form of judgement. While dropping judgement is a lofty goal it’s a very solid one to have in mind. I try to practice it, but I could probably try a little harder at times. When someone cuts me off as I cycle to the store, I may pass judgement and express it with my middle finger, and I am the first to acknowledge this doesn’t really further my goals.Continue reading “A tool you might get excited about. It’s not what you think.”