Do you have a tablet?

It is a point of some irritation to me that http://fionadobson.com/online-dating-advice-after-first-date/, who does write the most extraordinary diary entries (as my Patreon members will know), struggles with technology. Living only a few houses away in Huckleberry Close, she is wrestling with the idea of social distancing.

“But what is it, Fiona,” she said down the phone this morning. “Why don’t I come over and you can explain it to me? I keep hearing about it on the wireless.”

Yes, that’s actually what she said, ‘the wireless’. I told her not to worry, but to listen to her gramophone rather than the news.

That really does sort of miss the point. I have to say that for each person failing to do use social distancing we can expect this to last just a little longer. So, there is a bit of an incentive to get it right. Also, if you have an elderly parent, and you want there to be a respirator for them should they get this thing, well, there’s your incentive right there. It works and reduces the loading on the healthcare system.

Auntie Kittie is a conundrum. While baffled by even the technology to operate a doorbell, she is the only person in my regular circle who understands how to use a Norwegian wine bottle opener I have. It’s an electric device, ergonomically designed and as far as I can make out, entirely unusable. You could die of thirst in a desert with this thing it’s so complicated, and yet she figured it out and had a bottle opened and poured before I’d finished explaining to her that no one knew how to use it.

Auntie Kittie has only recently acquired a cell phone.

For those of you who regularly do follow the events here in Huckleberry Close, you might already have guessed that Sylvester actually does have a hazmat suit. I sent him over earlier to get Auntie Kitties phone and bring it back here so Max could install Whatsapp on it. That didn’t go so well. I had no idea a phone this old could even connect to a wireless network. Frankly I should be grateful it didn’t have a wire and a rotary dial.

Eventually Max called her and asked if she had a tablet, to which she replied she would look in the medicine cabinet and I think the phone got cut off after that.

Some of my neighbours are looking concerned seeing Sylvester walking up and down Huckleberry close in a hazmat suit. I think I’d better put the kettle on and make tea. It’s going to be a trying day.

Now, I’m not going to give you medical advice or any more COVID19 news. There’s other sources for that. I would recommend middle of the road reporting such as Apnews.com, BBC , Axios and CBC . These are actual news sites and not entertainment sites. If you believe anything you see on Fox News you pretty well deserve everything you get, I’m sorry to say. That might be a case of Darwinian evolution in practice. All I can say is, don’t be a covidiot.

What I can suggest is that you occupy your time with Clothes Maketh The Man, or if you want something interactive our Whatsapp Group is having a wonderful time. This week we’ve have Toenail Tuesday lined up for our members of Whatsapp tomorrow. There’s always discussions about music, and cooking, whether or not Skye from Paw Patrol is hotter than Dr. Smith (in the new Lost In Space) and of course no end of crossdressing chat. You are never going to be bored if you join us on Whatsapp. It’s different every day.

I am often online at present on the website, and in the Whatsapp Group so feel free to stop by and say hi.

Stay dressed, stay isolated and stay safe.

Fiona

Quarantine in style.

In our Whatsapp Group the gurls are preparing for Toenail Tuesday, and painting their toe nails. You can join us by becoming a member of the Elite Whatsapp Group.

I’m amazed at the creativity of my lovely members. We’re talking about all kinds of fun things and having a ball. Subjects covered today have included: Nails, Prince Harry (who doesn’t mind if he doesn’t make the scene, he’s got a daytime job, he’s doing alright…) the string section at the end of A Hard Rain’s Gonna Fall, Poison!, an empty ski resort in Colorado, and whether Greenpeace activists are hotter than Friends of The Earth activists (“she looked like David Bellamy with a hang over.”), and of course – what to wear during isolation.

Remember, it’s not what you do, it’s the way that you do it… Join us and we’ll get through this together.

🙂

Fiona

  • http://FionaDobson.com

The Art Of The Toilet

Sylvester very kindly dropped in this morning.  He was concerned I might not have put together a good supply of things to get through the next little while, as many of us hunker down for a while.  I think I am well prepared, however there was one thing I did find a little curious about his care package.

On the top of the package was a book by Donald Trump.  I felt this was a little odd.

“I know things are bad,” I commented.  “I don’t think they’re quite that bad, though.  My reading list is quite extensive, and this would be somewhere behind Dyanetics, or perhaps the Montreal telephone directory of 1985.”

“It’s meant as toilet paper,” commented Sylvester.

“Oh, yes.  I suppose it always was.  Well, it’s good to find some use for it.”

Below are some very helpful toilet tissue links. It’s good to put these things behind you, of course. I was visiting Washington last month and a good friend of mine who we will just call ‘Nancy’ put me on to several reliable suppliers. You know she has them in each bathroom and is lobbying to have the installed in the bathrooms in The Capitol Building.

I realise a lot of my members will be stuck at home for various reasons in the coming weeks, and frankly as inconvenient as it is it’s also the responsible thing to do at present. We don’t need to either expose ourselves (calm down) or be exposed to more people than absolutely necessary. With this in mind I will be spending more time online chatting through the site or through our Whatsapp Group.  I’ll also be raising the frequency of posts on FionaDobson.com and my Patreon. We’ve got a great series running on my Patreon at present, Poison! – you can read the first installment here.

If you are bored be sure to check out the Whatsapp Group as it includes discussions about all manner of things, and we’d love to see you in there. You’ll never be bored.

😊

Fiona