I am surrounded by idiots.

I sat in my garden this afternoon, socially distanced from my two expectant looking guests seated nearby, beside the gentle shape of a bouganvillia, off-setting the colours of the smokey pink and soft grey of my summer dress. Sylvester and Rainbow, Sebastian’s sister, looked on hopefully.

“So, let me get this straight,” I said. “You’re asking me – and Sylvester I think I am quoting you correctly – which is better:

                A: Sylvester’s idea, a facial scrub which is made by simply driving along behind a gravel truck while sticking your head out of the car window.”

At this point Sylvester was nodding and grinning like a chimpanzee that has just found the key to a kitchen cupboard full of banannas.

I continued, “Or B: Rainbow’s idea, a facial scrub made of vanilla extract, cream, vegetable oil, oatmeal and aloe, which is then smoothed on the skin and allowed to dry, before driving along behind a gravel truck while sticking your head out of the car window.”

Rainbow smiled at me vacantly and nodded.

Sometimes, I feel like I am surrounded by idiots. It may seem a harsh thing to say, but it’s true. I considered the question for a moment.

“Obviously,” I said at length, “the answer is ‘B’.”

Sylvester looked crestfallen. Before he could ask why I continued.

“The answer is ‘B’ because you could charge more for it and therefore make more profit. This might mean that in time you could afford to hire the team of psychiatrists that would provide the help that you both so obviously need.”

In these trying times of Covid-19 and failing businesses I am finding many of my friends are searching for new business ideas and as such my marketing expertise is in great demand. Perhaps you, too are surrounded by similar challenges.  If you are, you have my sympathy. Such is the lot of those of us who serve.

Be sure to join my Patreon if you’d like to lend a hand to myself and the sadly challenged people with which I surround myself.

Have lovely weekend, and stay safe.

Fiona.

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