Probing Fiona’s Inbox.

I had a very sweet email from a member today, and I think it worthy of sharing. As I do so, I hope you’ll enjoy this glorious video. It serves to remind us that, even among the turmoil and confusion, the world is still full of beautiful people. You are one of them.

In her message Erin mentions:

“It seems I can’t keep away. I’ve contacted you before. I’ve been a unicorn member. I have a profile on your site. You gave me the beautiful name Erin. But I’ve deleted my account and e-mail since then. I decided to stop exploring this side of me but it seems I can’t. I always get back here. I don’t know what to do.“

Erin goes on to say, “I’ve been back and forth so many times now that I can’t remember what I have and haven’t done. It is kind of stressful and I guess that is why it all becomes a bit blurry for me. I don’t know what to do. “

Well, I really do understand. While we are exploring, particularly in the early stages, we have little understanding of what is happening. Perhaps this is just a fun fetish, or maybe it’s something very much deeper. In either case, regardless of where we are on our particular journey, I tend to believe we are best trying to understand what is going on. As we learn more about ourselves, and what feels right, we get some good clues about where this is going. I know my own journey was anything but a straight line. It can be confusing and quite frightening at times. However, bringing things into the structure of a program allows us to develop in a more structured way, which so many have found more comfortable.

Additionally, while the stories and fetish side of the issues are fun, there’s also some good learning to be had from there. And diving deeper into my site you can find more information about the psychology of this (, the politics ( and of course a bit of news ( As one does accept this side of oneself you will find yourself taking a deeper interest in some of aspects of the gender non-conforming life. This can be eye opening and surprising. My reply to Erin is below.

Hi Erin,

Don’t worry. This is a side of your life worth exploring properly and not being confused about. We can work together to help you feel a little better about things. The first thing I’d suggest is to listen to this – – and really understand it. I’d also say that when doing the premium program you should allow yourself not only to dress and act in a feminine way, but allow your mind to also think in that same manner. Before long, if you give yourself to this, you will find that what you wear is really not important. It’s who you are and how you think. That rapidly becomes increasingly femme in nature. For some of us that will be expressed in clothing and mannerisms, but for some of us it is a far more psychological process. And then again, for most of us it is a combination of the those factors, resulting in us being the people we are meant to be.

I would encourage you to continue this exploration and not allow your concerns to hold you back. Only when we understand ourselves, after all, do we really start to understand others.



I think we’ve all felt like this at times. If you’d like to comment on this, go to the site and add a comment about your own experience. I know others will be interested.

As we explore we also realise this side of ourself has it’s own challenges to overcome. And we will overcome them, and I will be right here beside you as you do so.

That however is not the main reason I am writing to you today.  There’s a couple of things to tell you.  The first is that the new episode of Clothes Maketh The Man is out. Those of you loving Andy, or Andrea’s, adventures are going to enjoy this one.

The second thing I want to mention is that on my website I am increasingly finding it wise to place some of the content behind a password.  Don’t worry, there’s no charge, nor requirement for a credit card. Don’t loose your password. I am doing this purely to add a little more security to the site and protect my members. This won’t affect those of you who prefer to see content in your email, however when browsing the site don’t be too surprised if you are asked to log in.  If you’re not registered you can do that here –, and then you just log in at  

I must say I find logging in a pain at times, too. The thing is I do have to protect some of the content especially in these times when the anti-trans voices are in the ascendency. If you’re not a paying member, don’t worry, you still have all the access you’ve always had. And, of course, you will still get email with topical and exciting content as ever. The other method of enjoying my content is on my Patreon –

The sun is out in Vancouver, and sailing is getting going. I’m going to do my makeup now and slip into a wetsuit.

Have a lovely week.



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