Inside the dark closet, you can’t tell what color the walls are.
The way we think about biological sex is wrong – Emily Quinn
How crossdressing can change the world.
I was sitting in my kitchen this morning, a skillet sizzling on the hob spilling delightful aromas out into the garden, when I heard the sound of Sylvester’s chopper drawing into my driveway. Sensing the presence of sausage he often unaccountably appears. Now, the same could be said of some of my gurlfriends, but that really is another story.
Arriving just as I was about to pour the coffee, Sylvester showed up with his niece, a glorious young creature of thirteen.
“Fiona, this is Anastasia,” he said as he entered. “She’s heard so much about you, she said she’d like to join
The Secret Lives Of Kenya’s Drag Queens.
How to talk (and listen) to transgender people.
Gender should be the least remarkable thing about someone, but transgender people are still too often misunderstood. To help those who are scared to ask questions or nervous about saying the wrong thing, Jackson Bird shares a few ways to think about trans issues. And in this funny, frank talk, he clears up a few misconceptions about pronouns, transitioning, bathrooms and more.
Become a Patron!Trans people are not defined by their transitions.
@gloria_swansong #stitch with @mags_a_million Let’s clear the air on what Transgender means and what the movement is all about. #trans #transnonbinary #transhistory #lgbtqeducation ♬ original sound – Gloria_Swansong
Let’s clear the air on what Transgender means and what the movement is all about.
Transgender is about transversing genders, spanning the space between male and female. It is a broad term and doesn’t specifically define one gender expression.
Become a Patron!
How to talk to your partner about crossdressing. Part 5
Remembering that this is all about timing, we’re going to move a conversation into the area of fantasies. This should not seem forced, so pick you time carefully. Don’t just say “The weather’s nice for the time of year, and by the way, what do you fantasise about?”
Wait for your moment. Approach the subject with sensitivity, and be gentle. Tell her you would love to know what she fantasises about, because you want to make her happier and to serve her sexually as well as you can.
Continue reading “How to talk to your partner about crossdressing. Part 5”
How to talk to your partner about crossdressing. Part 4
At this stage you’re beginning to move your partner toward acting in a specific manner with you. She’s been primed, sees herself as a liberal thinking and open to intimate suggestions (after all, everybody sees her that way), and she sees herself as being in control in a liberated and powerful way.
Continue reading “How to talk to your partner about crossdressing. Part 4”
How to talk to your partner about crossdressing. Part 3
The next step is once again a subtle progression in the direction you’re trying to go. When you’re out with your wife and she’s buying cosmetics take an interest. Ask why she likes one brand of make up over another. Be sure to have a sincere interest.
Continue reading “How to talk to your partner about crossdressing. Part 3”
What doctors should know about gender identity.
Many of us look to the medical profession for guidance. Sometimes we should think twice about that. Our own communities are stronger and more educated than theirs. Until they get their heads around non-binary gender issues we should tread with caution.
FD
Become a Patron!How to talk to your partner about crossdressing- Part 1.
The first thing to remember here is that your going into this with a plan. You’re not just going to spring it on her, and hope for the best. Far from it. By the time the issue comes up you’re going to have laid the groundwork for this to work beautifully.
Continue reading “How to talk to your partner about crossdressing- Part 1.”
Lenni and Jules – Are you woman enough to be a trans woman?
In this discussion with Lenni and Jules from Http://FIonaDobson.com we look at how we set goals as people in the gender fluid and queer space. In this Jules refers to a Gender Rebels podcast about ‘Lost Girlhood’. You can find that here – https://t.co/WoafGjoTod.
One of the members of our Whatsapp Group just posted this…
Lenni, a cis female member of our Whatsapp Group posted this to the group and it came to my attention. It’s a beautiful short movie, poignant especially at this time. Please watch and share.
At a time when youth need all the support they can find, this hits the target beautifully. Our Whatsapp group is here to support all comers. Lenni and her wife have been LGBTQ activist for the last 25 years. It’s hardly suprising that such a supportive message should emanate from her.
FD
Become a Patron!I found this rather beautiful.
I don’t know the story behind this post yet, but I will try to find out.
FD
Let’s go back to basics.
So many of my members have spent years suppressing their desire to dress, and only once it is indulged do they find a sense of joyfulness. Sometimes this is accompanied by feelings of shame and guilt, and it all seems very confusing.
Suppressing these feelings can result in frustration and depression. Often members report that they never understood why they felt so lost, until they began to allow this side of themselves to emerge. Prior to embracing their gender fluidity they report feeling lost and fail to understand ‘why is this happening to me’?
For the vast majority of my members it’s about easing into a more comfortable place on the gender spectrum. For some it may be as simple as becoming just a little more androgynous in the way you dress and think. Others will of course find they do want to allow themselves to become far more feminine. I’ve certainly found that many people now go as far as using HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy), either herbal or pharmaceutical, without any desire to go for full surgery.
In the end my Premium Program is created to help you find the appropriate place on the gender spectrum that will work for you and fits with your lifestyle. There’s an expression in the LGBTQ community, which originated in the gay and lesbian world, but is very applicable to those of us who consider ourselves to be gender fluid.
“We don’t raise our young. Instead they have to find us.”
Some of us take quite a while to find our tribe. This can take the form of people in your own community or even systems like my Elite Whatsapp Group – where many people find support and friendship. Hopefully we get there in the end. That’s when things start to make a little more sense.
Fiona
Sometimes the smallest things give us away.
I received a lovely message this morning from one of my members, Leticia. They wrote a lovely description that I feel I should include below.
“It’s always a treat to hear from you, your stories are so clever and sexy. I am fortunate to live on the outskirts of a small town, and the road out front leads into open country, through farmland all the way to the state line, and across a river. I try to take a long walk every day, and it’s a perfect chance to practice my feminine walk, flowing with a graceful sway. I am wearing running shoes, but I don’t need high heels to swing my hips. It helps me feel like a woman.”
This reminded me of an incident many years ago. I felt it worth recounting, as sometimes we give ourselves away without even knowing it. You can see my reply below.
Hi Leticia,
What a lovely picture you paint. I am so lucky to have so many wonderful members. You remind me that once, years ago, I had a friend who was studying kinesiology. They watched me walking down the street one day, before I’d really emerged as being so very gender fluid and came running along after me very excited.
“Do you know,” they said, “that you walk exactly like a woman. I can see your hips swinging and the motion you use in your gait – it’s so very feminine. I’ve not seen that so pronounced before… in a man. I mean, it’s sort of unusual.”
My acquaintance was suddenly aware that their enthusiasm for their study and their observation were a little inappropriate, and a moment later they felt quite awkward. I don’t think they realised that they’d seen something that was developing and growing within me and that it would become quite impossible to suppress. It was most enlightening, though I don’t think they really realised just how very deeply ingrained that characteristic was.
🙂
Fiona
Sometimes who and what we are emerges in ways we least expect. I have learned not to fight it, but to just allow it to happen. I hope you do too.
You’ll see that throughout my website and the contents of my Patreon I talk about accepting yourself as you are, and creating yourself as you desire. Sometimes we can’t really help it.
Have you experienced similar moments of revelation? Be sure to tell me about them in the comments below.
😊
Fiona
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Do you know who you are?
We are all put in boxes by society, family and the wider world. Gender, once considered a fact – is now understood to be more fluid and mysterious. In this heartfelt talk Geena Rocero tells her story.