In this discussion with Lenni and Jules from Http://FIonaDobson.com we look at how we set goals as people in the gender fluid and queer space. In this Jules refers to a Gender Rebels podcast about ‘Lost Girlhood’. You can find that here – https://t.co/WoafGjoTod.
The way we think about biological sex is wrong – Emily Quinn
Trans people are not defined by their transitions.
@gloria_swansong #stitch with @mags_a_million Let’s clear the air on what Transgender means and what the movement is all about. #trans #transnonbinary #transhistory #lgbtqeducation ♬ original sound – Gloria_Swansong
Let’s clear the air on what Transgender means and what the movement is all about.
Transgender is about transversing genders, spanning the space between male and female. It is a broad term and doesn’t specifically define one gender expression.
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What doctors should know about gender identity.
Many of us look to the medical profession for guidance. Sometimes we should think twice about that. Our own communities are stronger and more educated than theirs. Until they get their heads around non-binary gender issues we should tread with caution.
FD
Become a Patron!Fear of Trans Bodies – Lily Alexandre.
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My friend Andy asks the difficult questions.
Follow Andy’s Youtube here – https://www.youtube.com/@Andy_trans_positivity
Support Andy directly here – http://buymeacoffee.com/transgenderpositivity
Andy has requested that if you are feeling generous and would like to support an organisation, they’d like you to consider Mermaids UK, or Transrescue. Both do amazing work supporting trans kids in the UK, and helping trans people move to a safer country. You can find out more about them and donate here:
https://mermaidsuk.org.uk/ – https://mermaidsuk.org.uk/?form=donate
https://transrescue.org/ – https://transrescue.org/donations/donate
That ain’t no way to treat us.
This post first appeared on my Patreon. I’ve been traveling in Brazil and following some tech challenges could post only on my Patreon. If you’re not already a member on there, this might be a good time to join.
As I continue to travel here in Brazil I am falling into a routine of listening to the news as I shower and prepare for the day.
I wash and shave, even with HRT there’s still a little shadow there. I don’t really suffer from dysmorphia, but I really don’t like facial hair. It is something of a reminder of something I want to leave behind. So I shave thoroughly, as the BBC newscast goes on and I hear of further erosion of trans rights in the US.
In the mirror I see the reflection of my upper body. I see the curve of my breasts and I brush my hair, now long and lustrous after years of care.
On one breast I have the names of Nex Benedict and Brianna Ghey tattooed, memorializing two of the many trans people who have been tragically taken before their time. I honor them and say their names each morning.
I say a prayer for all my trans sisters as I ready myself for the day. That reflection reminds me that the sun will still come up, I am still transgender, and no executive order will change that fact. The Gulf of Mexico is still the Gulf of Mexico, and life does go on.
The actions of one insecure little man will not change any of this. It is still a wonderful world. Those who mistreat us define themselves through their cruelty.
We will still be here.
What’s in a ‘femme’ name.

When chatting online I often ask my CD members and friends what their femme name is. Most of us have one and as we develop this side of our personality we learn to treasure it. After all it is something we have given ourselves.
One of the reasons it’s important is that it gives us something on which to hang all the complexities of the identity we’ve chosen. It gives ‘her’ personality. When we are first called our femme name it gives us a thrill, and each subsequent time it’s used it subtly nails home this part of ourself. It’s a continual reinforcement of who we are.
Each email, each time a friend online and each time someone in our daily lives use this name we are further confirmed as who we really are. This is true whether you are just dressing now and then in private or out and working toward transition. In either case it’s an important part of us. For this reason I encourage all my members to select and use a positive name and give themselves to it.
I’ve even got a great hypnosis file to help reinforce the name. You can find it here – – https://fionadobson.com/your-feminine-identity-self-hypnosis/ – I suggest you use this self hypnosis file even if you’ve been using your name for years. It will help you adopt the name as part of yourself.
For those who have yet to choose a name, here’s a good way to do so. Think back to when you were in high school. Likely there was a girl there who you admired. There were some aspects of her character you liked, and you’d like to have today. Perhaps it was her winning smile, or the way she moved. Maybe it was her feisty attitude, or perhaps her depth and thoughtfulness. By choosing her name you are doing a few things. One is to honor the memory of this person, even if you’ve never seen her since and never will. You’re also affirming subconsciously your admiration of the characteristics that she exhibited. By using her name you’ll find that you are quietly reminded of how good you can be. Your name will silently influence you to be a better person. A person you can admire.
While some people like a very Sissie name, like Trixie or Candie, these names communicate a rather different message. Yes, you can call them ‘stripper’ names. Well, chances are that if you’re using a name like that those are messages you are trying to communicate. There’s nothing remotely wrong with that, as long as that’s the image you wish to present to the world. Personally I like to dress femme everyday, so whether I am in a client meeting at work or going to the sports centre I want my name to fit.
If I were introduced to a new client at a meeting as ‘Trixie’ they might think the entertainment had arrived. So, your name says a lot to the world in general and also to yourself. If you’re at a total loss to find the right name then here’s a little trick. Take your year of birth, and then put it into a google search preceded by ‘popular girls names’. It’s likely that in the first four or five names there will be a name that feels right. I’ve helped many members with his and it usually works. Apart from anything else, if you’re 45 and stumble on a name that was never popular among people of your own age it will probably never feel quite right.
The first few times you use the name it will feel a little strange, but before long it will begin to feel right. If you sign up to a few mailing lists ( here’s a good one – http://FionaDobson.com/my-programs) with this name and start getting used to seeing it in your inbox you will soon delight in it. When someone calls you by your new name you will find it a delight. And before long it will feel as natural as… well, as ‘Fiona’ does for me.
Fiona Dobson.
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What caused me to realise I need to transition?
If you like this video Andy requests you donate to Mermaids – the UK charity – here’s the link: https://mermaidsuk.org.uk/?form=donate.
Get ready to swallow!
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How to talk (and listen) to transgender people.
Gender should be the least remarkable thing about someone, but transgender people are still too often misunderstood. To help those who are scared to ask questions or nervous about saying the wrong thing, Jackson Bird shares a few ways to think about trans issues. And in this funny, frank talk, he clears up a few misconceptions about pronouns, transitioning, bathrooms and more.
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When it’s time to take the makeup off.
The serious side of Man Or Bear.
The recent viral internet discussion about ‘Would you rather meet a bear in a forest or a man?’ has sparked a lot of comment. I don’t really follow these things very closely, but I did notice one discussion where the influencers concerned twisted it a little by adding ‘would you rather be stuck in the woods with a transwoman or a bear’.
I am not so silly as to think this is a serious discussion, and the channel involved is a very low volume one. However, the comments were both transphobic and made light of a rather more serious question.
The temptation is to think which is more dangerous, man or bear. However the real question one should ask is, ‘are we doing enough to make women feel safe around men?’
Continue reading “The serious side of Man Or Bear.”Crossdressing – Keeping it in the family.
Does the family know? Do you share it? There’s a lot of questions about crossdressing, and gender fluid life that are likely to emerge. How does one handle that? Enjoy this discussion with Jules and Lenni, as they explore the subject.
Graphic Color Block Button Down Shirts Short Sleeve 80s Blouse Top – $28.99

Revisiting Contrapoints – Incels.
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How to talk to your partner about crossdressing. Part 2
In our last session we got you to think about presenting the idea of how you’d like to look so much better, and you mentioned you are aware how some people look so much more groomed. You complimented your partner on their looks and their skills making themselves look so manicured and refined.
Continue reading “How to talk to your partner about crossdressing. Part 2”
Keeping it in the family.
When a partner decides they want to explore the gender fluid world of crossdressing it’s going to introduce some new strains on a relationship. But does it have to be the end?
Become a Patron!Outed – A discussion about trans life with Lenni and Jules.
What happens when someone is outed? Lenni and Jules discuss the challenges of being ‘outed’ as a crossdresser, or transgender – intentionally or otherwise. Be sure to participate with the continuing discussion via Whatsapp here: https://fionadobson.com/join-our-elit…
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