In our last session we got you to think about presenting the idea of how you’d like to look so much better, and you mentioned you are aware how some people look so much more groomed. You complimented your partner on their looks and their skills making themselves look so manicured and refined.
You then also set up the background to your partner being understanding. You created a legend for her to live up to.
In these exercises you’re also being as genuine as you can. It’s important no to appear manipulative or sketchy, even though you are creating a situation your partner will find steers them in a particular way. In fact, by the time you’ve gently put the right ideas in her head, your partner is going to end up asking you to dress for her. Now, we’re not there yet, so stay with me for a while.
You next move is very simple. Don’t rush it, though. Like all good plans, this will work best if you take plenty of time and be as natural as possible with it.
You’re going to ask about how she keeps her skin so soft. Talk about how she always looks so good, and that her skin has a lovely glow. Ask her to show you how she does it. Use the phrase, ‘I wish I could do that. I don’t want to look like an old reptile when I’m older.’
Ask her to show you how she does it. ‘Do you think that would help me?’
Reinforce the complement whenever you can. Help her feel special and that she has a particular skill.
You next move, once again giving her about a week to digest your words, is to simply ask her if she can do anything to help you make your skin feel softer and clearer. Ask as though you don’t really expect a positive answer, and don’t be afraid to say, “I know some men do this, but I don’t think it’s very masculine, do you?”
That little question is going to give you a clue to see if this is working. You’ll be surprised. You might well find she starts to encourage you to moisturize your skin. If she helps you, be effusive in your thanks. It’s always good to praise your partner., and this is exactly the right moment to do so.
Don’t rush things. You’re going to be tempted to push forward and start trying to get more of her help. This is not the time. Just accept her help and express your thanks and enjoyment. You’re still laying the groundwork.
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